Adjusting to Change During a Move
If you’re in the military, moving is a given. A fact of life. And actually, it is a really good part of military life….most of the time.
The Ornery Moving Hormone
Long ago, when all the other military wives were receiving their gear, I must have been late that day. There is one basic military supply item that I didn’t get issued.
This pivotal piece of gear keeps military folks plugging along quite nicely when it comes to moving. It is the Transitional Adjustment to Change Accelerator—TACA for short. (I’ve been in the military long enough; I can make up a few of my own acronyms!)
Some gals have the TACA and seem to breeze through all aspects of transitions involved with moving.
I’m still waiting for mine to arrive in the mail.
I must confess that I struggle with the Ornery Moving Hormone (OMH). You see, the sight of cardboard boxes on the curb, moving vans in driveways often makes me feel just a little nauseous.
Seasoned military spouses like myself, are NOT supposed to feel this way; we’re supposed to be enthusiastic, energetic, and anxiety-free movers and shakers.
Just letting you know that in this department, I am not the model military spouse.
Go figure–that’s the Ornery Moving Hormone at work.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Some of this orneriness is because I don’t like the process of change, and I don’t like all of the work involved with said change. Do you struggle with this?
Do you struggle with this?
Here is a taste of OMH at work during my last move.
Flash back to 2011:
You see, the I love my corner of the world, even though when I first got here I didn’t think I would ever like it (Evidence of more OMH at work).
It usually takes about 6 months of getting settled for that to pass. I really don’t like all the emotional upheaval that curses through my veins during this 6-month adjustment zone.
Once adjusted to the change of moving across the world, I loved living in Japan. Now that it’s time to go, I just want to pack up all the people and places that I love about this place and take them with me.
Do you think the Japanese would mind if I take just one little beach with me?
Or how about a restaurant?
An Emotional Tug of War
Don’t get me wrong, I’m looking forward to moving back to Virginia. This will be my first time EVER moving back somewhere I have lived before.
But, at the same time, that ornery I-don’t-want-to-move hormone is letting loose its unwanted presence in my system. It dredges up old insecurities that seem to go hand in hand with changing addresses.
I think it comes down to the issue that I want to have my cake and eat it too. I want to stay, but I am excited to go. I want to go, but I don’t want to give up the things I love about my current location.
Although it’ll be great to be closer to family, I don’t want to unpack, paint, hang, organize, and sort on the other end. See this is the Ornery Moving Hormone gearing up for a good ride!
Unpacking is not my favorite thing!
As with many things in life, we can’t have it all. In case you haven’t noticed, it is impossible to be both here and there at the same time!
[tweetthis hidden_hashtags=”#moving, #milfamily”]We can’t experience the benefits of change without the letting go of what must be left behind. [/tweetthis]
So come June, I will box up my souvenirs from Japan, add many memories to my scrapbook, and head back to the States, knowing that there are just some things you can’t pack.
Courage for the Little Things
This week’s focus is on moving and transitions. Each year, I try to hit this topic as so many of the awesome readers of Ginger’s Corner are military folks. Military or not, sometimes we have to move, whether it is new schools, new...
My First YouTube Video: The How-Not-to-Worship Song
After much dragging of feet and a lot of help from my awesome son, I am pleased to post my very first YouTube video! God has been nudging at me to venture out and do something with some of the video I have. What did these nudges look...
Am I Willing? Living Out the Foot-Washing Lessons of Christ. Part 2
If you missed part one of this post, take a click over and catch part one.
Have you ever noticed that God often asks us questions?
Call it conviction.
Call it insight.
Call it what you like, but if we will quiet our thoughts and read His word reflectively, we will often hear the questions God speaks to our hearts. Washing the feet of his disciples, Jesus is a living picture of the humility of service.
Lesson Four: Don’t Skip the Washing
Peter said to Him, “Never shall You wash my feet!” Jesus answered him, “If I do not wash you, you have no part with Me.” John 13:8
Has God ever surprised you with how he chooses to work? I am pretty sure none of the disciples entered the upper room that night expecting Jesus to wash their feet.
Am I willing to learn, when the lesson is not what I expected?
Being willing to let Christ cleanse our hearts and wash away our sin is integral to relationship with Christ. Some things we can’t skip. There is only one route to purity and that is through the cleansing of sin. True humility of service requires that we be cleansed from our inner-selfishness. I can’t pretend I don’t need it or that Christ isn’t interested in getting involved with the dirt on my feet.
Again, I sense the Spirit’s whisper, “Are you willing?”
Lesson Five: Knowing is not the same as doing.
IF you know these things, you are blessed if you do them. —John 13:17
If is an interesting word, isn’t it? Folded up in those two little letters is possibility and choice. The word If raises a question. Maybe we will, but then again…maybe we won’t.
There is blessing for us in obedience in serving others, even in the most menial of tasks. There is also sweet blessing in the cleansing touch of Christ. My eyes seem to stick on the word IF, as I recognize my tendency to know something but not follow through and do it.
Am I willing?
Lesson Six: Live it out.
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.–John 13:34-35
I find it interesting that Jesus gives such a vivid demonstration of humility in serving others before teaching about the importance of loving one another. Context adds layers of meaning that I miss when I read this verse by itself. Serving and loving, can you really have one without the other?
At first glance, this is a seemingly simple command: love others.
Familiar words, until we read as I have loved you. Loving others as Christ has loved us requires a willingness to serve and sacrifice, to love without condition or expectation.
Am I willing?
Humility, willingness, service, cleansing, follow-through, and love-crucial steps to living out the foot-washing lessons of Christ. What we do is part of that visible picture of love that identifies a disciple.
From demonstration to command, Jesus never teaches for the sake of knowledge alone. The life-lessons of Christ are always tied to the transforming grace of obedience.
Lord, make me willing.
What are some of the ways you live out the Foot-Washing Lessons of Jesus? Leave a comment and share your story:)
Am I Willing? Living Out the Foot-Washing Lessons of Christ. Part 1
Familiarity can dull our senses and routine can blur our vision.
Ever get used to things being a certain way, comfortable in the familiarity of routine?When it comes to reading Scripture, we can sometimes drift off to autopilot when we’ve read it before. At least I can.
Recently I touched on the passage of Jesus washing the disciples feet as he demonstrated humility and service. Although this passage may be familiar, let’s resist the temptation to think, “Know that…” A closer look and a moment of our time is all God needs to break through the attention barrier to shine the light of grace.
Join me today and later this week as we consider a few foot-washing lessons.
Jesus… got up from supper, and laid aside His garments; and taking a towel, He girded Himself. Then He poured water into the basin, and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel with which He was girded.–John 13:4-5
Lesson One: Get up from the table.
Acts of service require that we get up from the table. Service begins with a willingness to stop what we may be doing in order to serve others. Uncomfortable, I think about all the things piled up waiting for my attention. Serving others?
Am I willing? This phrase echoes in my thoughts.
Lesson Two: Lay it aside.
Laying aside his garments…Jesus prepared to do the menial work of a servant, washing the feet of his disciples. As I read these words, the Holy Spirit quietly asks, “Are you willing to get up and lay aside in order to serve?”
I think of the times that I grumble inwardly when I am interrupted mid-project. I think of my snippy answers when asked to add something else to my loaded list of tasks.
Am I willing?
Good question.
Lesson Three: Sometimes understanding comes later.
When Peter asks, “Lord, do you wash my feet,” Jesus answers, “What I do you do not realize now, but you shall understand hereafter.” John 13:7
Stuck in my I-know-best way of thinking, I can relate to Peter’s question and confusion. There have been times when God’s directions or provisions don’t seem to make sense in light of what I think I know now.
Sometimes understanding why God is doing something in our lives is a process. Deeper understanding is often anchored to time and experience.
Am I willing to get up from my familiar life, lay aside my outward trappings in order to serve others with humility? Am I willing to wait for understanding that comes over time?
How about you? Is God prompting you to get up from the table and lay something aside in order to serve Him today?
From a Military Wife on Memorial Day
An American flag waving in the wind, never fails well up an emotional response of love for country.
I did not plan to be a military wife.
“Did I ever tell you that I want to go into the Marine Corps and fly jets?” I was shocked silent. Little did I know that this question was God’s way of introducing major directional change. This startling question came from Mark, a guy I had been dating for a just a few months.
All my if-this-works-out daydreams had never covered even a thought of active duty military life. Though my dad served in the Navy in World War II, I knew nothing of living life in the military.
And I didn’t want to.
I wanted to stay put in one place and live a predictable life. I had no real-time context for the military life.
Was this guy going to suddenly turn into Rambo?
“Are you going to get a tattoo,” was the first thought that came to my mind as I tried to envision my guy as a Marine. All I could think of was the worst that Hollywood movies had to offer.
I wasn’t quite sure about this whole military service thing. A few months later, while Mark was gritting it out in OCS, Officer’s Candidate School, a co-worker asked if we were talking about marriage.
“I don’t know. He’s joined the Marine Corps.” I said this like he had a disease. My co-worker reminded me that I would be marrying the man, not the job.
“I don’t think that’s true with the Marine Corps. If I marry this man, I am also marrying into the Marine Corps and all that entails.”
Welcome to the Marine Corps.
Time passed, and my once-civilian boyfriend became my lean and green Marine husband. I will never forget the swordsman at our wedding who whacked me on my backside with a drill-instructor firm, “Welcome to the Marine Corps, Mrs. Harrington!” That was the first time I was addressed by my new name.
Twenty-two years later I can say without a single regret that military service has become both an honorable and a personal part of my life. It has shaped our family life in countless ways.
We are all better for it.
Through the years with a military family.
- Commitment to God, country, and duty.
- Integrity and leadership.
- Camaraderie and faithfulness.
- Sacrifice and honor.
These are just of few of the core values that permeate and sustain the military family. Though I may have been a reluctant military bride, I am so proud of my husband and all that he has given to both our nation and our family.
Today, I know that I am not alone in gratitude for those who have served our country through military service.
Just a few weeks ago, my husband retired. As they placed the folded flag into his hands, I exhaled a soul-sigh of relief that he had survived 24 years of service healthy and whole. I had not realized that somewhere deep inside, I had been holding my breath. Tucked away out of sight was 24 years of resolve and fear of what could happen if…
Navy Captain and long-time friend Bruce Hay retired my husband in April.
I know through personal experience many times over that many who serve in our military do not come home. Too many do not have the opportunity to celebrate retirement with family and friends. My heart breaks for each one of these families both past and present.
These are the ones who are on my heart today. Join me in remembering with honor those who have sacrificed their lives serving our country.
Truly we are the home of the free because of the brave.
Please feel free to show your honor for our military by passing this post along.
More Than a Volunteer…Putting My Inner Wimp to Rest
Today I am continuing my last post, Just a Volunteer…and Other Accusations from My Inner Wimp.
Here I am still prepping work for the upcoming Writer’s Conference. I want to pull my brains out of my ears I am so twisted up with proofing. My Inner Wimp chimes in, “You know you missed something that is going to make you look like an idiot.” All morning My Inner Wimp has been nagging me, “You’re just wasting your time to go to that conference again this year. You’ll never be…more than a volunteer.”
Stopping me in my tracks this morning, I got a Holy Spirit nudge take a moment learn from Jesus, Washer of feet and Saver of souls. “Who are you going to listen to? Me or your Inner Wimp?
Whose voice do you heed?
Why is it when we are feeling crunched and most need to hear from God that we think we are too busy?
I am so glad I listened to that little God-nudge! Here are a few observations that God used remind me of the value of serving, preparing my heart to walk confidently into that crowded conference room a few days from now.
A Secure Identity
“Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into His hands, and that He had come forth from God and was going back to God, got up from supper, and laid aside His garments; and taking a towel, He girded Himself. Then He poured water into the basin, and began to wash the disciples’ feet…“–John 13:3-5
- Being before doing—Jesus knew who He was and what God had given Him to do.
- The meaning was in the service and the example; Jesus wasn’t worried about achieving a particular result.
- Jesus volunteered his heart and his hands in serving others.
- In regard to washing the disciples’ feet–few noticed, but the world was never the same.
So what does all of this have to do with attending conferences, trying to get a book published, and getting rid of My Inner Wimp? What does this have to do with any act of our service?
- When I am secure in my Christ-given identity, I am better able to serve others, even in a task like writing.
- I know what God has given me to do for this season.
- I can focus on the act and heart of service, rather than worrying about the outcome–especially important when sitting across the table from a publisher.
- Never lose the heart of serving and writing in the lure of being noticed and gaining success.
- Large numbers count in the world’s economy, but God tallies value on an entirely different scale.
Maybe your acts of service look a little different. God has shaped us all with different gifts, skills, and experiences. He breaks forth from our hearts with differing desires and unique callings. Some service is humble and little noticed, but oh, so valuable in the Father’s eyes. Some places of service are huge; we find ourselves trying to cover chasms of need with Band-Aids and feeble efforts.
Tasks may be large or small, but the humility of service is the heart of a volunteer.
This is what I need to remember when I walk into that crowded conference room Sunday afternoon.
So much more than a volunteer.
This is the value and the truth that puts my Inner Wimp to rest, so I can enter boldly with the heart of one who serves the God Most High.
In what ways are you more than a volunteer? How do you put your Inner Wimp to rest?
Like this post if you are more than a volunteer!
Just a Volunteer…and Other Accusations From My Inner Wimp
Nervous, I stepped into a room of four hundred new faces. “Do you really want to be here,” My Inner Wimp whispered. I scrunched my eyebrows together, certain that I had not packed this unwanted guest. She continued, “You don’t belong in here. These are the professionals, and you, my dear, are just a volunteer.” My Inner Wimp can be rather nasty if I let her get a word in.
Have you ever felt the disdain of that phrase, just a volunteer? In today’s hard-driven, everyone-seems-successful world, the word volunteer doesn’t have much clout or glitz. Service isn’t glamorous, and it often doesn’t pay the bills.
Just a volunteer?
Yet it has been in serving that I have discovered and developed gifts and skills that lay buried under the surface. It has been through volunteering my time as a Bible teacher and Women’s ministry leader that has been God’s way of revealing my calling. Serving others, encouraging with a Biblical message, showing other’s how–this is ministry and it is true joy.
Just a volunteer? I don’t think so. There…I put My Inner Wimp in her place, determined to make the most of a new experience.
I found a seat and carefully placed my bag filled with my hopes and dreams under the seat in front of me. So many writers. So many talented people with a God-given story to tell. Such a competitive business. My Inner Wimp tried her best to convince me to give up, with thoughts like, “No one cares what you have to say.”
I stuck it out and had a blast, learning new information and meeting interesting people. The new friend in this picture is Alycia Morales.
By the way, My Inner Wimp had to find her own way home. (I was hoping she’d get lost…)
Fast forward a very quick year:
I am busy getting ready to return Blue Ridge Mountain Christian Writer’s Conference. Just a few more days, so I am feeling the excitement–and the pinch–of wanting to get all my ideas and pitches ready to go. Once again, I will enter that crowded room filled with writers, hopefuls, agents, editors, and publishers. Once again, I will have some dreams tucked into my briefcase. I will pitch my book to agents and editors, nervous that I will sound like…just a volunteer. This year, My Inner Wimp is going to be locked in the basement with no chance of sneaking into my suitcase.
What accusations does your Inner Wimp say?
If you have ever felt like just a volunteer, Like this post and pass it on.
Enjoy this related post: 3 Steps for Getting Rid of My Inner Wimp
Mom-i-tude Adjustment for Frazzled Moms
Let’s all just pretend it’s Mother’s Day. I could use a little appreciation around here–how about you?
Oh the bliss of Mother’s Day. A day of recognition and appreciation for the blood, sweat, and tears of all my mama-work throughout the year…about time!
A day my children will rise up (before ten?) and call me blessed.
A day that someone else will do the dishes.
I hope.
I think a lot of the things moms tend to think on Mother’s Day. Where are we going to eat? Are the kids going to cook? Will they actually wrap my present?
Did they get a present?
I fully intend to bask in my well-deserved Mama Glory…until I am nudged to realize that I have been so busy lately that I haven’t taken time to just enjoy being a mom.
Feeling spread too thin is not good for the Mom-i-tude.
I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off–squawk-squawk! I make goofy mistakes like try to open the front door with the unlock clicker for my car.
I put Lemon-Pepper Seasoning in my purse instead of the cabinet because…I am trying to do six things at once!
It’s more than true: feeling spread too thin is not good for the Mom-i-tude.
Know what I mean?
Frazzled moms can do goofy things.
Time sneaks up on me and I am late to pick up my daughter from practice. I clip coupons…but forget to take them to the store. Rushing, I spill an entire container of pineapple juice in the refrigerator. Then I am aggravated that I have to stop and clean up my mess.
I have felt pressed with frustration of a To-Do list longer than a roll of toilet paper, and to be honest, it has made me just a little crabby.
I have felt guilty when kids want me to drop what I am doing to take them someplace..and I don’t want to. I have growled my inner-GRRRrrrr…when the phone rings, when the tenth interruption comes in the same hour, when the family has the audacity to comment that the house is a wreck. Imagine that.
It’s time.
Time for a Mom-i-tude adjustment.
My friend, Jen, posted this on Facebook. Seeing this cute Mother’s Day note is the reminder I need.
I need to laugh and cherish the smile factor of my kids.
Past or present, they fill my heart with joy.
Wacky Day Forever
My heart is full with many little moments that have made me smile over the years. Taking time to enjoy those sweet moments is important.
The cute things kids do
Even when they become teenagers and those little cute things grow up, they make me laugh. Sorry to break it to you, but my teens no longer bedtime read stories to the dogs. Now they do funny things like sabotage family picture day:
I needed that laugh…
How about you? Do you need a Mom-i-tude adjustment to breathe a little zip into your parenting?
Taking time to remember precious things that kids do breaks through the tension and reminds me to laugh. I stop to give a hug…just because. I breathe deep and reach for joy.
Remembering joy turns to my focus to gratitude.
Joy and gratitude soothe like a cool balm, calming my stress. Perspective shifts and my Mom-i-tude brightens. I let go of the grit of frustration scraping across my last nerve.
I listen as God uses the lighter side of life to whisper to my heart:
… mother rejoice; may she who gave you birth be joyful!–Proverbs 23:25
Note to self: Busyness, schmiziness…don’t ever get to frazzled to enjoy the journey!
How do you adjust your Mom-i-tude?
Share this post with other mom’s that could use a little encouragement. Just click on one of the media buttons–so easy:)