The Battle of the Dirty Dish
No matter how many times you wash your dishes, they just get dirty again. That is way it generally works. This is not rocket science. It is merely the routine of the biological need of our bodies to eat and replenish energy. Though necessary, those dishes just keep piling up. Do you ever just get tired of washing the same dishes again and again? One solution could be to get new dishes, but then we’d just get tired of washing those dishes too. So the problem isn’t the dishes is it? The issue lies more within our attitudes toward the routine and mundane tasks of life.
There is a problem with my dishwasher.
Many days my dishwasher is rather ornery and tends to procrastinate.
Now I am not talking about my Kenmore here…
I am talking about the human dishwasher.
Unlike my Kenmore, I can’t go to Sears and buy a new one when this one acts up.
I can’t call the Maytag repairman to come fix the heart that resists the imposition of this task. Changing my dish soap will make no difference…Joy, Palmolive, or whatever will not solve this issue.
I learned a long time ago that not washing the dishes doesn’t work out well for long. You eventually run out of clean dishes or out of space to put the dirty ones.
The bathtub really isn’t the best place for the overflow.
Though I might have a little grumble in my innards from time to time, I am not really the source of this kitchen battle. In reality, it is my Under-Twenty crowd that gives rise to this kitchen skirmish. It is the teenage dishwasher that needs a little adjusting in my household.
Believe it or not, I did teach and train my kids to put their dishes in the dishwasher when they were younger.
Dish washing training began at a young age around here…while it was still a fun thing to do.
There were days we played dish washing with lots of suds and plastic items in the sink. It was FUN.
They asked to do it. (I knew I should have video taped some of those moments.)
From the time they were four years old, they had “jobs” to help Mommy with the dishes–washing and putting away. In elementary school, our kitchen ran like clock-work and the chore chart was the source of positive reinforcement with the fun of cool stickers. Well, stickers, no matter how bright and shiny, are no longer a good source of motivation.
When they became teenagers, the task somehow became something to be avoided.
Open dishwasher, insert dish, shut the door…it’s not that hard people!
Just when they are old enough to actually do a good job with this task and truly be helpful, the battle begins. At my house we trade kitchen tasks by the week because remembering who did the dishes yesterday seems to be way too taxing for all of us. I have an excuse…I am over forty. But the young one’s are still firing all of the synapses in the brain and should be able to remember who did it yesterday.
Yeah, right. So we go by the week.
Much about character and priority is revealed in one’s attitude and follow-through (ie obedience) in the world of dish washing. This task seems to swipe off all of the appearances of the helpful child, revealing the true heart that would rather be…texting.
How texting possibly compete with the joys of a clean and tidy kitchen I cannot understand…but it is true.
If you don’t believe me, just ask your teen which they would rather do, text or wash.
Enough said.
Why don’t teenagers like to wash dishes?
Blame it on the Media.
I think the problem lies with the media. Dish washing is not glamorized on TV these days. Yes they have kitchen shows, but they are popular with few teens and you rarely see Rachel Ray washing her dishes. The glory is in the food prep and presentation.
One solution is to glamorize dish washing in the media. How about some MTV videos featuring the exciting art of dish washing rather than break dancing?
And have you noticed that there are no X-games for dishwashers? No competitions of Olympic proportions with cool uniforms. What incentive is there to train and build skills if there is no glory of competition…no opportunity to win trophies or accolades for dish washing.
What are we thinking?
There are few cool gadgets for dish washing…no crazy-fun soap dispensers, no cool noises, and no neon colors (unless you’re into that color for your dishes). Seriously–a sponge, a rag, or a spray nozzle is as good as it gets. A rag?
No wonder no one gets excited about washing dishes.
And the answer is…
If these suggestions are not to your liking, you can always try the age-old parenting technique of reward or punishment…but like I said before,stickers no longer work, and there are only so many times you can take away the phone, the ipod, or time with friends. If you bring out the big guns for dish washing, what is left in your arsenal for the battles that are far more serious issues?
Though this is true, there are ways for the savy parent to motivate the teenage dishwasher. Reality discipline is quite effective. You don’t help, you don’t eat. That is pretty much going to be the way it is once they are out on their own, so they may as well learn this life lesson while they are still under your roof…
However you choose to wage your battle with the dirty dish, I hope you are successful so you have time and energy to enjoy the finer things in life…
because dish washing ain’t one of them!
Winning the Battle of Kitchen Counter Clutter
Okay…enough of the funny stuff. Here are a couple of tips that might actually help: 1. Special spot for Glasses: Make personalized coasters from 4″ tiles and place them near the sink. (Home Depot or Lowe’s have these) Teach...
Six Never-Work Strategies for Winning the Battle of the Clean Kitchen Counter
Well, here it is two weeks later and I must admit that I am more than a little disappointed that one of my brilliant readers has not chimed in with a Problem-Solved-Ultimate-Solution for the battle of the kitchen counter top. Alas, I must come up with my own solutions, so what you get…is what you get:)
Six Never-Work Strategies for the Battle of the Kitchen Counter:
#1 Top-Rated Trash Can Method:
The Trash-Can Method of Clutter Control
This number-one fix is rather self explanatory. The answer to Kitchen-Counter Clutter is to take a shower squeegee and sweep all clutter into the trash can. Those unfortunate souls who have left their junk on the counter will quickly learn to dump their stuff somewhere else. This solution is by far the fastest fix for the never-ending PILE.
Pro: Quickly eliminates clutter of all kinds
Con: Do I really need to go there?
#2 The Swat Method
Don’t Put That There! Swat!
The Swat Method Works for the Whole Family
This is my favorite method. All you need is a fly swatter or a spatula so little expense is involved. (Have you ever noticed how much money you can spend in the quest for organization?) All you have to do is stand gaurd over your clean counter…armed and ready to swat anyone and anything that has the audacity to place undesirables on your sweet space. “Smack.” This simple method works quickly. Everyone in your family will quickly learn to stash their keys and cell phones somewhere else.
Pro: Quickly retrain your family to put things elsewhere
Con: It doesn’t work very well on yourself. If you are like me, and I truly hope you’re not, you are your own worst enemy when it comes to clutter-making.
#3 The Disguise-It Method:
This method of clutter control is popular with basket collector’s and the like. Find some attractive container…a Longaberger basket or a Nike shoe box will do–take your pick. Cram all your unsightly clutter in the attractive container and wa-lah! Instant fix. The plus of this method is quite handy–you can actually find what you are looking for because it is all disguised in your attractive camouflage!
Pro: Coralled in one attractive container, your clutter will not look like clutter.
Con: It’s still clutter.
#4 The Cover-It-Up Method:
The Cover-It Up Method–who knows what’s under there?
Similar to the disquise it method, the Cover-It-Up method stems from the same mentality–don’t get rid of it…just hide it. You will notice my clever-cover-up…who says table runners are just for tables! What a great place to hide your bills until you actually get them paid. This also works well for school papers kids are always bringing home…though I do recommend displaying thier artwork in a more visable spot. Someday you will actually miss those cute hand-print and crayon creations.
Pro: Looks great.
Con: Limited clutter-cover.
Seriously…there are better options!
#5 The Eat-Out Method:
Avoid making a mess in the first place and then there will be no clutter to control. If you use the Eat-Out Method consistently, you can even install a velvet rope like they use at the movies to keep everyone out of the kitchen in the first place. (The added benefit of this is you can also say good-bye to mopping!)
Pro: Less time in the kitchen=Less mess in the kitchen
Con: $$$
#6 The Deligate-It Method:
Assign the Job to the Neatest Person in the Family–Not Me! My sixteen year old is hands-down the neatest person in the family. I am quite sure that she did not get that kind of DNA from me. I hereby appoint her the dubious honor of being the Clutter-Free Queen and pass all such duties into her capable hands. I will admit that I have not actually tried this method…but it sounds great in theory.
Pro: You no longer have to keep up with the clutter.
Con: Don’t get me started…
You may be asking yourself why I would take the time to write about this…I can’t really give you an answer, but it has been fun to have a little laugh at one of those things in life that can be a source of great frustration.
Check in tomorrow, as I will be sharing some strategies that actually do work. Some I have used and some I have found through surfin’ the net. Check out some solutions that you don’t have to be Martha Stewart to implement, as well as some cool blogs and products I have discovered.
The Swat Method Works on the Whole Family
Kitchen Battles
Do you ever feel like your kitchen is a battleground? So much of family life takes place within 5-10 feet of the fridge. Ever noticed this? There are so many days when I can’t seem to get out of this room–maybe I should move my...
Transition is Not a Bad Word
At times it can be tempting to think of transition as a bad word–one we’d rather not have to work through. However, it is a good thing that transitions are part of the journey in every life that is well-lived. They may be small changes, such as your dentist retires. You find another dentist and life goes on, Some transitions are merely inconvenient–things like needing to actually use those reading glasses. Others you know are coming…such as teenagers and driver’s licence’s. Some are exciting…job promotions and graduations. It is true that some transitions can be challenging, particularly for those of us who hang onto the familiar with an iron-clad, emotional grip that rivals the strength of Arnold Schwarzenegger. Transitions are game changers.
Transitions are that space between what was and what will be.
The sign post at the road of transition reads…not yet.
Transitions can include emotions of grieving what has been left and wondering what is next.
For me, they can be places of restlessness. The route on this ride includes rest stops in towns like grief, insecurity, displacement, loneliness, uncertainty, and sometimes, just general orneriness. These are often stops on the journey, but it is up to me as to how long I stay there. The nature of a rest stop is that it is a brief pause on the trip; it is not the destination. Nobody stops off at that rest area at the border of North Carolina and Virginia and says, “Now this is a nice place….think I’ll just stay here for a while”. Nobody camps out at the rest stop; in fact, if you try, those helpful guys in crisp uniforms and lights on their cars will make sure that you move on.
We need that sometimes, don’t we?
For me, it can be a temptation to get stuck where I don’t need to stop, and it is also a temptation to rush ahead when I need to wait.
On the other hand, there are also parts of the transition journey that are exciting. New opportunities, new friendships, new experiences and routines. New things to learn and do. Transition is often the process God uses to make room for new experiences and new growth in our lives.
The process of letting go and emptying our hands leaves them open for God to put something new into them.
I personally don’t enjoy hanging out empy-handed.
So… God is teaching me lessons of learning to wait with the patience that is a by-product of faith. God is very purposeful about transitions and he only moves when he is ready. His readiness is guided by his loving and providential plan for this next season of life. Though emotionally I may want to rush and grab hold of the closest thing so that my hands aren’t empty, I am learning to wait on God. After all, do I want my life to be filled with what was quick and easy, or do I want to be available to grab hold of the purpose and blessing that God is putting into place? I don’t know about you, but I would rather wait on God and do it right.
“But God’s not finished. He’s waiting around to be gracious to you.
He’s gathering strength to show mercy to you.
God takes the time to do everything right—everything.
Those who wait around for him are the lucky ones.”–Isaiah 30:18
Transitions often create fertile ground for God to move us from one place to another spiritually as well as circumstantially.
When we are trusting God in transition, it opens the way for deep work in the heart that cannot be scheduled or rushed. Out of my comfort zone, I am learning to lean into him and wait for the new route to emerge.
When I begin to look at transitions from this perspective, the picture changes from what I am loosing to what I am gaining.
It is faith that stands in the gap spelled t-r-a-n-s-i-t-i-o-n and looks forward to what God has next.
There are things God is waiting to do in our lives that aren’t going to happen if we are warming the bench at the rest stop.
It is faith that rises up and shouts, “get back on that bus and move on!”
God Goes Before Us
Uncertainty, challenges, and transitions often stir up fear, resentment, or tension. As a military spouse, I’ve faced many uncertain situations. To be honest, the moving often sent me to the edge. Letting go, facing the unknown, and finding new support systems often made me an anxious wreck. (You can read about that in this free chapter of my book.)
How do you find stability and security in a transitory life? It’s hard.
Deuteronomy might not be your favorite book of the Bible. Maybe it’s one you’ve avoided, but trust me on this. You want to get hold of this truth about our God who the same yesterday, today, and forever. One morning, I was battling fear and anxiety and a pretty big dose of resentment at having to move. . . again. God really spoke to my heart and I hope you will be strengthened by the words to follow.
If you need hope, prayer, or encouragement for navigating an uncertain situation in your life, take a moment to prayerfully read this passage from Deuteronomy.:
“The LORD your God who goes before you will Himself fight on your behalf, just as He did for you in Egypt before your eyes, 31 and in the wilderness where you saw how the LORD your God carried you, just as a man carries his son, in all the way which you have walked until you came to this place.’ 32 But for all this, you did not trust the LORD your God, 33 who goes before you on your way, to seek out a place for you to encamp, in fire by night and cloud by day, to show you the way in which you should go.” –Deuteronomy 1:30-33
At first glance, this was my first response: Oh great, another thing I’m messing up in my life. On some level, it felt a little like a smack on the wrist. But then, I read it again and God prompted me to focus on the specific characteristics of God. The important thing isn’t my struggle. I’m human–my faith is often weak.
What gave my faith a God-sized boost was focusing on what God does.
What are you focusing on today, your problems or struggles or on the attributes of God?
Here’s the truth, at times we all struggle to trust God when we can’t see what’s ahead or when we don’t like where we think we’re going.
Why we can trust God with our uncertainty:
What an amazing picture of the goodness of God! Embedded in these words are some principles that are true in the trials and transitions that every child of God goes through:
God goes before us—we are not alone.
When we are following God, He will fight on our behalf.
When we find ourselves in the wilderness (difficulties and confusion) on our way, God will bring us through with loving care.
There are times when God carries us, just as a father carries his child.
God seeks out a place for us.
God will show us the way we should go.
Each one of the principles above are specific ways God both cares for and takes care of us.
When we resist God. . .
But For All This
I find myself haunted by Moses’ words when he says, “But for all this, you did not trust the LORD your God…”
On those days when I struggle with negative thinking or a fearful outlook…
On those days when I think I am staring a giant in the face…
I am hit between the eyes of my soul as I realize how easily I forget how good and faithful God has been in every change and transition.
Hope for When Emotions and Insecurities Get the Best of You…
So often in scripture these same concepts and patterns are played out in our lives. The details of the situation may change, but the principle resonates through time, out of the pages of ancient writings, and into the details of our day and the challenges that we face. Friend, we can learn from the examples—emulate the good and avoid the negative.
The take-away from this is really very simple.
Not easy.
But simple.
When we face difficulty, insecurity, and adjustments that come with trials or transitions, we can make the holy and whole choice to trust God.
We can move forward because God goes before us.
Hold on to the truth that He is with you and will help you get where he is leading.
A Prayer for Hope in Your Transitions
If you find yourself in a situation like this, where your emotions and doubts are getting the best of you, join me in this prayer:
Lord, forgive me that I have been discontent and fearful about_________. Change my perspective so that I can move forward and enter into what you have for me. This place, this situation, is unfamiliar and uncertain, but there is blessing here. I ask you to give me this place/situation, to make it my own and to fully possess what you have for me here.
Now I speak your word to myself: do not fear.
You are going before me and you will fight on my behalf, just as you have done on so many other occasions. I believe that you will carry me through each challenge as a father carries his son. What precious care you give, even when I can’t see it. Give me eyes to see the ways you are taking care of me today.
Thank you for fighting on my behalf. I trust you to show me the way I should go. Guide my choices and decisions—may they be prompted by faith rather than fear.
Because I rely on you, I will not let my emotions hold me back.
Turn my heart from resistance, fear, or discontent. Give me a willing heart to trust your leadership.
Lord, I want what you want.
I will go where you lead.
Amen
You’ve Been on This Mountain Long Enough Part 2
You’ve been on this mountain long enough… we have all had moments in our lives where change and transition urged us forward—whether we were ready or not. This is part of the push and pull nature of transitions. A few weeks ago, I shared some insights from Deuteronomy 1 that God has used to encourage me to get moving with a “believe it then see it” mentality. If you missed part 1, scroll down two posts or click January 21 on the calendar located on the side bar.
God’s Instructions
In this passage, the Israelites have arrived at the edge of something new—a place God had promised was His hand-picked destination—the Promised Land. You will remember that they sent some spies to check things out…and they came back with a mixed report. Remember they had three instructions—here is THE LIST:
Get going.
Take possession of this new place.
Do not fear or be dismayed. (ie trust God to be faithful)
You will notice that sending out spies to bring back analysis and reports is not on this list. Just saying…
Let’s peek a little further into this first chapter of Deuteronomy as Moses recounts mistakes of the past:
“…they brought us back a report and said, ‘It is a good land which the LORD our God is about to give us.’26 “Yet you were not willing to go up, but rebelled against the command of the LORD your God; 27 and you grumbled in your tents and said, ‘Because the LORD hates us, He has brought us out of the land of Egypt to deliver us into the hand of the Amorites to destroy us…”–Deuteronomy 1:25-27
Reactions of Fear
This is not looking like THE LIST above! Here is the reality check of their reaction:
Not willing to go
Rebelled..ie refused to go…
Grumbled, complained, found fault, and worked themselves into a fearful tizzy.
Do you notice the over-reaction of their emotions? I am struck with a feeling of familiarity as I notice the downward spiral of emotional thinking. How did they get from, “It’s a good land…to “the Lord hates us”…to he purposefully brought us here to destroy us… The bottom line of this kind of thinking had some very serious repercussions for the Isrealites—thier trust in God gave way to the flood-tide of suspicion that sprang forth from their insistence that they “see it in order to believe it.” The end result was missing out on God’s best, while they wandered for 40 years. The purpose of an entire generation was forfeited when emotions replaced faith and refusal replaced obedience.
Can You Relate?
It can be easy to think, “Oh you silly Israelites…” until I remember times when my thinking has spiraled in uncertainty and I have struggled to believe that God has a good purpose in this or in that challenge. I don’t know about you, but at this point in the story, I know that too often I have found myself in a similar thought process and ended up in an emotional mess.
As you think about transitions in your life, have you ever had those days where what you think you see is overwhelming? Have you sent out your spies and found out there are some problems that seem bigger than you have the energy or ability to tackle? Has your vision shifted from God’s faithfulness to the size of a giant’s foot? Don’t let it hold you back. If God has lead you to that place of transition, hang on to faith and step forward. You just might find the adventure of a lifetime.
Here’s a bit of truth—
What you look at is what you will see.
What you think you see can easily become what you believe.
What you believe dictates how you will respond and what you will do.
Join me next time as we talk God’s faithfulness in our challenges and transitions as we continue looking at Deuteronomy 1.
Welcome to Ginger’s Corner
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You’ve Been on This Mountain Long Enough
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