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How to Wait on the Lord and Receive New Strength — Even When Hope Feels Gone
Feeling weary and wondering where strength comes from? Discover what Isaiah 40:29–31 really means and how to wait on the Lord to receive new strength.
Have you ever found yourself in a moment where you don’t have the strength you need?
Not the kind you can push through with determination or fix with a better plan. But the kind where your soul feels tired. Grief lingers, disappoint hangs heavy, or exhaustion stops you in your tracks.
When the next step feels harder than it should, one question rises. Where does strength come from when mine is gone?
That’s not a small question. And it deserves more than a small answer.

God’s Promise Was Written for Weary People
Isaiah 40 was written to people who had been through years of hardship, uncertainty, and long seasons of waiting. God didn’t offer a checklist or a correction. He offered a promise:
“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who wait on the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” — Isaiah 40:29–31
Notice who this promise is for. Not the strong. Not the self-sufficient. Not the ones who have already figured it out. It’s for the ones who know they don’t have what it takes. The ones who are struggling.
Which means this promise isn’t for when you have it all together.
It’s for exactly the moments when you don’t.

What Does It Really Mean to Wait on the Lord?
This is where everything in the passage turns and where we often get it wrong.
Waiting doesn’t mean doing nothing. In the original Hebrew, the word for wait carries the meaning to hope, to expect, to look for, to eagerly anticipate — even to bind yourself to something.
We’re all waiting for something. We wait for answers, healing, direction, relief, restoration. The question isn’t, are you waiting? The real question is what are you attaching your hope to while you wait?
Waiting whispers, I don’t have the answer.
Hope declares, but I trust the One who does.
Waiting complains, this is taking longer than I want.
Hope remembers, God is still at work in ways I can’t see.
Waiting groans, I’m too weak for this.
Hope believes, God promises strength to the weak.
When we separate waiting from hope, waiting feels empty.
We don’t like being in the waiting rooms of life. We want progress now and yesterday would be even better. When waiting is rooted in hope, it becomes a place of expectation.
Jackie Banas-Shank called hope the habit of permanent expectancy. This reminds me to trust God, rather than trying to fix and solve my way through challenges.
When we wait with this kind of hope, we’re not asking if God will answer. We’re asking when.
This is a very different kind of waiting.

Strength Is Renewed, Not Manufactured
Our culture convinces us we should be able to make ourselves strong.
We know how physical strength works — you put in the reps, you train the muscle, you build capacity over time. But Isaiah isn’t talking about that kind of strength.
The word renew here carries the idea of putting on fresh strength again and again. It is not about pulling yourself up by the bootstraps but receiving something new from God.
Fresh strength. Strength that doesn’t originate in you but is a provision of God.
Larissa came to this conversation carrying fresh grief. Just days earlier she had said goodbye to her faithful dog — the companion who had been with her through her hardest seasons, including the years since losing her husband.
And what she said hit home: “Not every season is soaring. Sometimes strength looks like running forward with endurance. And sometimes strength simply looks like walking one step at a time and not giving up. That’s kind of where I’m at.”
Not every season is an eagle moment of soaring.
Sometimes faithfulness looks like walking and not giving up. And that, Isaiah says, is what renewed strength looks like too. God meets us in the walking and in the soaring.

Why We Miss the Strength God Is Offering
If God promises strength to those who wait on Him, why do we so often still feel depleted?
It’s not because He is withholding or reneging on His promise. More often, it’s we’ve turned our attention to other things. Here are the places I see this happen — and I recognize every single one of them in my own life.
- We rush ahead instead of wait. We want relief now, clarity before the next step. Instead of waiting on God, we move ahead of Him fixing, figuring out, forcing what only He can provide. Before long we’re exhausted. Not because we’ve done too little, but because we’ve been carrying what was never ours to carry.
- We strive instead of trust. This one is subtle. Striving can look like planning, preparing, staying ahead of every possible problem. The anxious heart tries to live in tomorrow instead of today. We want a plan for every outcome, to think of everything that could go wrong. This is a form of striving that drains us. Then we wonder why we’re so tired when we’ve been working so hard.
- We disconnect instead of draw near. When we’re tired, grieving, or discouraged, the natural impulse isn’t always to move toward God. Sometimes we withdraw. We numb out. We binge something. We distract ourselves until the feeling passes. Intimacy with God comes when we bring it all to Him, not when we bring our best self to Him. He can handle the whole mess of us.
- We resist surrender. Waiting on God requires letting go of our timelines, our expectations, our it must be this way thoughts. It means releasing our need to understand, as well as our desire to control the outcome.
- We lose sight of hope while we wait. We’re still waiting, but we’ve stopped hoping. Nothing is ever going to change. This will always feel this way. God must not be working. Our waiting becomes empty rather than expectant. And an empty wait is exhausting in a way that an expectant wait never is.
The problem isn’t that God isn’t giving strength. It’s that we’re often looking somewhere else for it. We think things like, if I just try harder, if I stay strong, if I hold it all together, I’ll get through.
But scripture is clear here. God gives strength to the weak. If we’re determined to be self-sufficient, we might just miss the strength that he is offering. But the moment we turn back to Him; we begin to receive what He’s been offering all along.
How to Receive God’s Strength
Picture this. Your hands are full. Someone offers you a gift. You can’t receive it. Not easily. Not without setting something down first.
But if you set it down and open your hands — then you’re ready. Your hands are empty, open, and ready to receive what’s being offered.
Waiting on God often looks like that. Setting something down. Opening your hands. Releasing the has to be this way so your hands are free to receive what He’s giving.
So much of what we pray about, the Lord does answer. But sometimes He waits on us to loosen our grip first.
Open hands receive what clenched fists cannot.
What Waiting on the Lord Actually Looks Like in Real Life
Waiting on the Lord isn’t one single action. It’s a posture, a mindset, a way of thinking and believing and trusting that we return. Here are some of the shapes it takes in real life. As you read, notice which one meets you where you are today.
Waiting can look like prayer. Sometimes a full sentence, sometimes a whisper, sometimes just a groan your soul offers when words won’t come. God, I need Your strength. I need what only You can provide. Waiting begins when we turn toward Him.
Waiting can look like a posture. Bowing your head. Sitting still for a moment. Opening your hands. These small physical and spiritual postures help refocus our attention on God.
Waiting can look like letting go. Releasing an expectation. Setting down a timeline. Choosing to trust Him with the outcome instead of carrying it yourself. Releasing the need to have everything figured out, gives God the space to work in ways you can’t yet see. This is where waiting is hardest — and where it does its deepest work.
Waiting can look like simple willingness. Waiting can look like simple willingness. Not dramatic. Not heroic. Just a quiet yes. Yes, to waiting longer than feels fair. Yes, to a different answer than you hoped for. Yes, to something new. Yes, to trusting God even when you don’t understand. Sometimes that simple willingness is the most faithful thing we can offer.
Waiting can look like activity. Showing up. Staying faithful. Doing the next right thing, and then the next. Active waiting is still waiting. The everyday faithfulness of small things — that’s not the absence of strength. That’s strength at work.
None of these require that you feel strong first. They simply position your heart to receive strength from the Lord. And that is exactly what makes this a habit of hope.
This Week’s Habit of Hope
Choose one simple way to turn toward God today and trust Him to renew your strength, one step at a time.
It might be a quiet prayer when you feel overwhelmed. A moment of stillness before you reach for your phone. Releasing one expectation you’ve been holding too tightly. Choosing to trust God with something you don’t understand. Simply doing the next right thing in front of you.
Not all six. Just one. And then tomorrow, one more.
For the Weary and the Waiting
Friend, if you are in a season where your strength feels low and your hope feels thin, I want you to hear this.
God is not asking you to be strong enough for what you’re facing. He is asking something simpler. And harder. Trust Him to give what you need.
Not strength for the whole road, but strength for the next step.
Whether you’re soaring right now, running hard, or just barely walking — you are not alone. God is with you, and He is your strength.
Stay close to the One who gives strength to the weary. Return to Him again and again — in the soaring seasons and the walking ones, in the wrestling and the waiting. One small step, one quiet decision of faith at a time. Because hope is always our best habit.
https://youtu.be/SMtLtZZonDY
FAQ About How to Wait on the Lord
What does it mean to wait on the Lord? Waiting on the Lord is not passive delay. In the original Hebrew, the word for wait carries the meaning to hope, to expect, to eagerly anticipate, even to bind yourself to something. It is active, anchored hope — choosing to trust God’s faithfulness while you are still in the middle of not knowing.
What does Isaiah 40:29-31 mean? Isaiah 40:29-31 is a promise written to weary people — not the strong or self-sufficient, but those who know they don’t have what it takes. The progression in the passage — soar, run, walk — reminds us that renewed strength doesn’t always look like an eagle moment. Sometimes it looks like walking one faithful step at a time. God meets us there too.
How do I find strength in God when I feel weak? Start by turning toward God rather than away from Him. Waiting can look like prayer, letting go of what you’re gripping too tightly, simple willingness, or doing the next right thing in front of you. None of these require that you feel strong first. They simply position your heart to receive what God has already promised to give.
What is the difference between waiting and hoping in the Bible? In Hebrew, the words are deeply connected. Waiting without hope feels empty and frustrating. But waiting rooted in hope becomes a posture of expectation — we stop asking if God will show up and start trusting when. Hope is what transforms waiting from something we endure into the place where strength begins to grow.
This post is based on Episode 79 of the Habits of Hope Podcast. Listen to the full conversation with Ginger Harrington and Larissa Traquair — including Larissa’s moving reflection on grief, loss, and what it looks like to wait on God in real time.
Author Bio
Ginger Harrington is the host of the Habits of Hope Podcast and author of Holy in the Moment. Through biblical encouragement and practical spiritual rhythms, she helps women cultivate deeper faith and resilient hope for everyday life
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- Hope Beneath the Rubble:Finding Healing After Trauma with Jenn Hand
- What to Do When You Long for God to Speak to You
- Can Waiting for God Be a Good Thing?
Hope Beneath the Rubble: Finding Healing After Trauma with Jenn Hand
Delightfully joyful, Jennifer Hand loves coffee, play, and all things fun. She is the last person you might expect to find weeping in an earthquake zone. And yet.
She was on her knees in a village that no longer looked like a village.
Jenn had lived there before — had walked the streets in Nepal. She knew these people. Now there was only rubble where homes had stood.
A crowd of hurting people gathered, desperate for hope. Undone by what she saw, she knelt in the wreckage of what had been a church, weeping: Lord, where is the hope here?
And then she saw it.
Bent. Broken. Half-buried.
A cross from the top of that church, lying among the debris.
The Lord’s answer came quietly but with clarity that gave strength: There is always hope beneath any rubble — and that hope is the cross.
That moment in Nepal didn’t just shape a book title that Jenn would later write. It birthed a mission, a message, and a way of walking with people in their worst moments. God has sent Jennifer Hand to 58 countries and disaster zones around the world.
Jenn opened and closed our conversation with Psalm 139: I am fearfully and wonderfully made. It’s the scripture she returns to again and again, the reminder that God has numbered our days, knows us entirely, and has not been surprised by a single thing we have walked through.
The hope in this truth keeps her grounded.

When You Need Christian Healing After Trauma
Most of us will never stand in the literal rubble of an earthquake. But many of us have stood in something that changes our world — a diagnosis, a betrayal, a sudden loss, a season that rearranged everything we thought was solid.
Jennifer has spent years walking into holy grounds of suffering, as she calls them. She went to Nepal as a missionary, felt God calling her unexpectedly into a master’s degree in counseling, and then watched as a massive earthquake struck the country she loved. She spoke Nepalese. She went to help.
“When you’re in trauma,” she told us, “you feel alone. You feel isolated. You feel like you’re asking, will I ever be normal again?”
That question — will I ever be normal again? — is the one she hears most consistently, whether she’s sitting with a survivor in a third-world disaster zone or talking with a woman in a comfortable American church who has never told anyone how stuck she actually feels.
The geography and the situation may change, but the question doesn’t.
Why Can’t I Just Move On? Hope After Trauma
If you’ve ever wondered why you can’t simply release trauma and get back to normal, you will be encouraged by this conversation.
When your body still braces, still reacts, still carries what your mind has tried to let go, it’s important to understand that your body isn’t broken. It’s doing exactly what God designed it to do.
Jennifer explains that trauma doesn’t just affect your thoughts. It takes up residence in your body. When we sense danger of any kind — physical, emotional, or relational — our nervous system shifts from what she calls the thinking brain into pure survival mode.
The body does what it needs to do to survive. And it does that through one of four automatic responses: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.
Here’s the plain-language version:
- fight means you move toward the threat aggressively
- flight means you run from it
- freeze means you go completely still, unable to move
- fawn means you appease, people-please, or accommodate whoever feels threatening in order to stay safe
Four very different responses, all wired into us for survival. What we don’t always realize is how physiologically real these responses are. They can quietly run our lives long after the original threat has passed.
Jennifer describes it this way: imagine the pickup line at an elementary school. It is chaotic with every car for itself. A traffic cop stands in the middle trying to direct the flow. When trauma hits, your brain’s internal traffic cop goes into override. Your thinking brain steps back and the survival brain floods your body with one signal: survive, survive, survive. Your heart races if you’re a fighter. You go completely still if you’re a freezer. You feel, as Jenn puts it, like your legs are blocks of cement.
“Those are supposed to be our survival moments,” she said, “but not our thrive-in-life-all-the-time moments.”
Jenn reminded us that the number one thing a person needs reestablished after trauma is a sense of safety. Whether it’s physical safety, emotional safety, or relational safety, the ground beneath you has shifted, and nothing feels steady.
Scripture speaks directly into this need. Psalm 121 — from where does my help come? — and Psalm 91 — under the shadow of His wings, I can rest — are passages she returns to again and again.
“The reminder that we can rest under the shadow of the Almighty wings, His power, His protection,” she said, “I often have to go back to that again and again.”
The problem comes when the response gets stuck. When you’re still living in fight mode years after the original danger has passed. When a small thing triggers a large reaction and you don’t know why. When you’ve told yourself that’s just how I am for so long that you’ve stopped asking whether it has to be.
Jennifer encourages people to start noticing when a small thing creates a big response. “Pay attention to that,” she said. “It usually means you’ve been triggered, and you’ve gone into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.” She knows this pattern intimately. She’s a freezer herself — calm and capable in a crisis, and only later, once things settle, does she feel the weight of what she just walked through.
I recognized this in my own story. Many of us have learned to ignore our triggers and keep marching forward. We often believe “that’s just how I am” and keep going. It gets us through life. But it doesn’t make us healthy emotionally, spiritually, or relationally.
Why trauma gets stuck — and what to do about it: Trauma triggers automatic survival responses in the nervous system — fight, flight, freeze, or fawn — that are meant to protect us in dangerous moments, not define us permanently. When those responses get stuck, the body keeps living in survival mode long after the original threat has passed. Recognizing this pattern, without shame, is where healing begins.

Hope Is a Process, Not a Destination
Here is where Jennifer Hand gently disrupts the way most of us think about hope.
We want hope to be a switch we can flip and have it stay on. We want the stages of grief and healing to be linear. We prefer to check the boxes, to be done.
Wouldn’t that be something, Jennifer said, laughing quietly. “Linear. That’s hard to even say.”
“Hope is a process,” she told Larissa. “Just like grief.”
Sometimes the hope you have for today is something basic and small like taking the next breath. Even when that is the bit of hope available in this moment, it counts.
This matters enormously if you have gone through a season of trauma and felt the absence of hope like a physical weight.
Just because hope feels gone doesn’t mean it is gone.
It means it’s buried. Uncovering even the tiniest fragment — is where healing begins.
Larissa knew this firsthand. She has spent time in therapy following her husband’s death. Grief opened layers of trauma she hadn’t known were there. “It’s been painful,” she said quietly, “but also so healing.” This isn’t theoretical for anyone in the room.
When You’re Triggered: Practical Tools That Actually Help
Most of us don’t need more information about trauma. What we need is something we can actually do in the middle of a hard moment to heal and restore faith after trauma. We need something accessible, something free, something that works even when we have nothing left.
This is why Jennifer Hand wrote Hope Beneath the Rubble.
She has sat with people who have no access to therapy, no money for resources, no time for complicated routines. Here are some of what she shared with our listeners — things you can use today, right now, wherever you are:
1. Ground yourself in the present. When a trauma response is triggered, your brain gets pulled out of the present moment. One of the most effective ways to bring it back is through your senses. Jennifer walks through what she calls the 5-4-3-2-1 technique: five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, one thing you can taste. The practice is simpler than it sounds — you pause, look around, and notice and name each one. The act of naming pulls your brain back to the present moment and begins to lower the flood of stress hormones.
2. Breathe. It is free and you can do it anywhere. Square breathing signals to your nervous system that you are safe. Simply inhale for a count of four, hold for four, exhale for four. “It gets you out of fight-flight mode,” Jennifer said, “where you’re really not using your thinking brain.”
3. Move your body. Walking, specifically, does something powerful for a traumatized nervous system because of what Jennifer calls bilateral movement. The movement of left-right, left-right helps trauma stop getting stuck in the body. She explained, “Trauma often gets stuck in your body, and movement is one of the ways out.”
4. Taste something strong. Jennifer mentioned eating sour candy as a grounding technique, and Larissa claimed it immediately as her personal favorite. The strong sensation pulls you into the present moment when a flashback or triggered response has pulled you out of it. The physical sensation interrupts the loop.
5. Ask yourself what makes you come alive. This one Jennifer said isn’t even in the book. She offered it as a gift to our listeners specifically. In her counseling practice, before she ever asks a client about their trauma, she starts with this question. When someone is so exhausted that even breathing feels like too big a step, what they need isn’t a task. They need a spark.
“Life is here,” she said simply. “And that spark — whatever it is, even buying a new coffee mug — will begin to give you that.”

Can Scripture Hurt as Well as Heal?
Before we leave the practical tools, there’s something Jenn said that I don’t want to rush past. She is careful about how scripture is used with people in acute suffering. She said something I think many of us in the church need to hear.
She told a story about being in Nepal, riding on the back of a motorcycle. When a wreck left her with a gaping wound on her knee, her instinct was to put a bandaid on it. She didn’t want to bear the pain of cleaning the wound.
The wound, in her telling, is the unprocessed pain of grief, fear, anger, and confusion that trauma brings. The bandaid is the scripture quoted too quickly, before the person has been given space to acknowledge what they’re actually carrying. “And sometimes we can do that with scripture,” she said. “We don’t want to acknowledge and wrestle with the depths of what’s underneath — so we just quote Romans 8:28 and move on.”
Romans 8:28 — He will work all things together for good — is truth. She was clear about that. But it can also feel like “a weapon” for someone who doesn’t feel that yet. Someone in the middle of the wreckage doesn’t always need the promise of future good.
They need to know they’re not alone right now.
Instead, Jennifer shares another part of Romans 8: Nothing can separate you from the love of God in Christ Jesus. Not life, not death, not the present, not things to come. Nothing. “That is a key reminder,” she said, “that nothing will separate you from His love. Not your trauma. Not your survival mode. Not the feelings you’re afraid to name.”
She continued the illustration, “The streets of Nepal are dirty. If I hadn’t cleaned that wound out, infection would have come — and eventually it would have shown itself.”
Unprocessed trauma works the same way. The goal is never to avoid the hard thing. The goal is to clean the wound well enough that healing can actually happen.
How to use scripture with someone in trauma: Not every scripture fits every moment. Rushing to Romans 8:28 — He will work all things together for good — before someone has had space to grieve can feel dismissive rather than comforting. Jennifer Hand suggests reaching first for the scriptures that offer presence rather than resolution: Nothing can separate you from the love of God.
Does Caregiving Count as Trauma?
If you are caring for someone right now — or if you have, and you’re still carrying the weight of it — this is the section I most want you to read. Not because caregiving is the same as surviving an earthquake. But because Jennifer Hand says it can be just as traumatic.
I know this firsthand. I cared for my sister through her battle with ALS. I have dear friends in caretaking situations right now — including the particularly hard ones. Sometimes the person being cared for is not easy, not appreciative, not kind. That layer of hard deserves its own conversation.
Jennifer answered from the inside that experience. She walked through a caregiving season recently that was, in her words, horrific. She carries it. She also carries the faces of everyone she’s ever served in that role, and she wanted to speak directly to them.
She talked about Hagar (Genesis 16 and 21). The story of how God responded to a woman cast into the wilderness, alone, trying to care for a child with no idea what to do next. “God shows up as the God who sees,” Jenn said.
That’s the first thing you need to know if you’re a caregiver. You are not invisible. The behind-the-scenes work, the invisible labor, the exhaustion nobody thinks to ask about — God sees it. You are not forgotten.
“Shame is too heavy of a weight to carry while carrying someone else.”
The feelings that come with caregiving can range from heartbreak, anger, resentment, guilt, and overwhelm. Feelings are not evidence that something is wrong with you. They show that you are human and you are carrying something heavy.
“Take your feelings to God first”, Jennifer urged. “Then find one safe person and say, without asking for answers or platitudes or fix-it solutions: ‘I need someone to hold this with me.’ Sometimes what you really need,” she said, “is someone to just hold your suffering with you.”

How to Hold Someone’s Suffering Without Carrying It Yourself
If you love someone who is hurting — a friend, a family member, someone in your ministry or small group — you know this feeling. You sit with their pain, you listen, you pray. And then you carry it home with you. It settles into your chest and stays there.
You are not meant to carry what you receive. You are meant to be a conduit.
Jenn is intentional about this in her own life. When she returns from disaster zones where she has seen the worst of human suffering, she has a plan, a personal list of what brings her back to herself.
These are simple things that help her release and reset. Top of her list is journaling. She calls this praying with a pen in her hand. She also makes time for items on her own “coming alive” list. These are the things that remind her life is here, in this moment, in her specific body.
“Have a plan,” she said. “Very specifically, when you know you’re in the middle of walking with a friend through a tough time, know what you’re going to do to release.”
She also offered something unexpected at the close of the conversation, speaking to the listeners who are more visual, more creative, more alive when they have something to make with their hands. Coloring. Vision boards. Painting a scene that feels safe. Building a grounding box filled with things that calm you. “God can heal parts of your brain as you color and meditate and pray,” she said. The body and the spirit are not separate projects.
The Cross in the Rubble
We began here, and we have to end here, because everything Jennifer Hand teaches flows from that moment on her knees in Nepal.
The hope she is pointing toward is not a feeling to be manufactured or a process to complete or a destination to arrive at. It is something that was placed beneath the rubble long before we started digging. It is a cross. It is a God who sees, who knows, who loves, who has not forgotten. It is Emmanuel — with us — which is the name of God Jennifer returns to again and again when she walks into suffering, because it is the truest thing she knows to say.
“There is a God in heaven who sees you,” she said quietly, in the voice she uses when she’s standing on holy ground. “Who knows you. Who loves you. And has not forgotten you.”
Just because you don’t feel hope doesn’t mean you are hopeless. It means hope is buried. And one gentle step at a time, it can be uncovered again.
If this conversation has spoken to you, I hope you’ll listen to the full episode — and consider sharing it with someone who might need these words today.
Your Habit of Hope This Week
Choose one small thing this week — just one — that makes you come alive. It can be as simple as a cup of good coffee, a walk outside, or cutting pictures out of a magazine. Let that one thing be enough. Life is here.
Connect with Jennifer Hand: Find her book, Hope Beneath the Rubble: Healing After Trauma, linked in the show notes. Don’t miss the QR code inside the back cover — it unlocks free video teachings and companion resources developed to walk alongside the book’s practical tools.
Questions Our Listeners Are Asking
What is trauma, and how do I know if I’ve experienced it? One way to think about it: trauma is any experience in which you felt unsafe — physically, emotionally, or relationally. Jennifer Hand explains that trauma isn’t defined by the size of the event, but by the impact it had on your nervous system. She encourages people to start by noticing: do small things create big reactions in you? That noticing, without shame, is a place to begin.
What are fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses? These are your body’s automatic survival responses to danger or perceived threat. Fight means you move toward the threat aggressively. Flight means you move away from it. Freeze means you become immobilized — like cement blocks around your feet. Fawn means you try to appease or people-please to avoid conflict. Jennifer Hand explains how the nervous system can get stuck in one of these modes long after the original danger has passed — and how to recognize when that’s happening in you.
What are some practical grounding tools for trauma and anxiety? Jennifer shares several in this episode: the 5-4-3-2-1 sensory grounding technique (pause and name five things you see, four you can touch, three you hear, two you smell, one you taste), square breathing (inhale, hold, and exhale for equal counts), walking for bilateral movement, and even sour candy or holding something warm to bring yourself back to the present moment. Most of these are free and can be done without anyone around you knowing.
Can faith and trauma healing work together? Yes — and this conversation explores exactly how. Jennifer integrates trauma-informed counseling with deep Christian faith, but she’s careful to distinguish between scripture that steadies people and platitudes that can actually hurt. Her framework: God is big enough for all your emotions, including the ones that feel dangerous to name. Healing sometimes requires wrestling with God, not just quoting Him.
What does it mean that hope is a process? Jennifer Hand is clear that hope is not a switch you flip on and leave on. Like grief, it’s nonlinear — it moves forward and backward, and some days the only hope available is a single steady breath. Just because you don’t feel hope doesn’t mean you are hopeless. It means hope is buried. And uncovering it, one small step at a time, is what healing actually looks like.
Does caregiving cause trauma? Yes. Vicarious trauma — the impact of walking alongside someone else’s suffering — is real and can be just as profound as direct trauma. Jennifer Hand specifically addresses caregivers, noting that the shame and invisible nature of their burden makes it even harder to process. Her word to caregivers: you are seen, you are not forgotten, and shame is too heavy a weight to carry while carrying someone else.
What is Jennifer Hand’s book about? Hope Beneath the Rubble: Healing After Trauma is a practical, faith-rooted guide for anyone who has experienced trauma, grief, or overwhelming loss. It includes journaling prompts in every chapter and a QR code that unlocks free companion video resources. Jennifer wrote it because she kept seeing the same faces — from earthquake survivors in Nepal to Sunday school classes in Tennessee — asking the same question: will I ever feel normal again?
Meet Our Guest
Jennifer Hand is the founder Coming Alive Ministries and loves the honor of traveling nationally and internationally, providing the invitation to come alive in Christ through conferences, retreats, written resources and counseling.
Jenn has had the joy of serving in over 54 countries and speaking at around 40 events a year. With her Master’s degree in trauma counseling, God has opened a unique door for Jenn to respond after natural disasters around the world, providing trauma counseling and the hope of Christ on the holy ground of suffering.
Jenn is the author of 5 books, including My Yes is on the Table, published by Moody Publishers. Her most recent book is Hope Beneath the Rubble: Healing After Trauma.
This post contains affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
Resources Mentioned in this Episode
Hope Beneath the Rubble: Healing After Trauma by Jennifer Hand
Holy in the Moment: Simple Ways to Love God by Ginger Harrington
Related Content
Each link features the article, podcast, and video of the content.
- How to Scripture Journal (Episode 69)
- How Gratitude Can Anchor Your Heart in Grief and Trauma. Interview with Christian counselor, Heather Shealy-Mawhirter, LPC (Episode 61)
- How Rest and Solitude Restore Your Soul After Grief and Loss
- How to Find God’s Peace that Guards Your Heart | A Study of Philippians 4:7 (Episode 56)
- Finding Peace with Becky Keife | A Verse a Day for the Anxious Soul (Episode 58)
Starting Over and Feeling Alone? How God Meets You Where You Are
When you’re feeling alone in a new place and don’t have the strength to try again, God meets you where you are—often through small, unexpected moments that become something lasting.
When Starting Over and Feeling Alone Is More Than You Can Handle
The new student orientation is the last place I want to be.
My sixteen-year-old daughter stands beside me, fingers twisting the ends of her hair. She’s the new girl again. And I’m absorbing every bit of her nerves — which means I’m fighting my own.
After twenty-two years of military life, I am worn thin from starting over. Too many moves. Too many goodbyes. And somehow, it never gets easier.
The weight of change presses in as I scan a sea of unfamiliar faces. The noise of excited chatter only makes me feel more alone. I fold in on myself, wishing I could disappear. Not knowing anyone makes me feel invisible in this crowd.
I try to sound upbeat for my daughter’s sake. “This looks like it’s going to be a great school.” But inside I’m praying something far more honest than that.
Why Starting Over Is So Hard (And Why That’s Not a Weakness)
My husband served for 24 years in the United States Marine Corps. That meant our life was marked by frequent moves — new places, new churches, new beginnings, over and over again. We even lived in Japan for four years, which was beautiful, and stretching in ways I didn’t always feel prepared for.
Moving has never been easy for me.
After my Graves’ disease diagnosis, anxiety began shaping how I experienced every transition. Not just the day-of. For months before we left. For months after we arrived. I once told a friend that every move cost me a year of my life to anxiety. It wasn’t literally true. But it felt true. And that’s something.
What I was really feeling wasn’t just the stress of change. It was the loss of community. The loss of stability. The loss of knowing where I belonged.
Every move meant starting over. And starting over takes courage — a kind of courage I didn’t always have.
Over time I began to understand something deeper: friendships are a gift, but they were never meant to carry the full weight of my security. Only God can do that. Only He remains steady when everything else is shifting.
In a recent conversation with Kristen Strong, we talked about friendship, loneliness, and the courage it takes to keep showing up through seasons of change. So many of you reached out to say, yes — this is hard. I wanted to share this story because I think you might need it today.
When You Don’t Have the Courage to Try Again
That’s exactly where I found myself that morning at orientation.
I wasn’t just in a new place — I was in that familiar tension between needing connection and feeling completely worn out by what it takes to get there. Feeling alone in a new place has its own particular weight. It’s not just loneliness. It’s the exhaustion of knowing what starting over will cost you.
I didn’t feel strong. I didn’t feel brave.
The loudspeaker crackled with instructions, sending students one direction and parents another. My daughter looked at me. She smiled. She squared her shoulders with a quiet, steady kind of courage — a let’s-do-this resolve.
And then she walked into the crowd.
In this moment, this slip of a girl was braver than I was.
I’m the mother. The one who’s supposed to have it together. The one who is confident and unafraid.
I am none of those things today.
I retreated to a bench in the cafeteria, arms crossed, hoping the morning would pass quickly. And then I told God exactly how I felt.
Lord, I just can’t do this today. Meeting people is more than I can handle right now. I don’t have it in me to start over again.
If there’s someone here You want me to meet — You’re going to have to bring them to me.
Because today I don’t have the courage to say hello.
Here’s what I’ve learned: God is not put off by prayers like that. He is not disappointed by your emotions or your limits. He meets you where you are — not after you’ve pulled yourself together, but right in the middle of the exhaustion.
“When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.” (Psalm 94:19)
Not when the anxious thoughts go away. Not when we finally feel ready. But right in the middle — that’s where He shows up.
When God Meets You in Unexpected Ways
Ten minutes later, I heard my name.
I looked up to see Patti — the pastor’s wife from our new church — walking toward me with a smile. All of a sudden, the heavy air seemed easier to breathe. Relief rushed in like something physical.
“I want to introduce you to some friends,” she said.
She didn’t send me toward them. She brought them to me.
He didn’t send a dramatic sign. He sent a familiar face in a room full of strangers. A smile. An introduction. Two women — Kris with the curly red hair and Leigh with the dimple in her cheek — whose simple, gracious hello began to steady something inside me.
Hello is such a small word. But it carries something. You’re seen. You’re not alone. There’s space for you here.
Sometimes the smallest connection becomes the beginning of something much bigger than you can see from where you’re standing. In my mind, I could almost hear God’s gentle humor. His grace meeting my weary heart exactly where I was.
Isaiah 41:10 has carried me through more hard transitions than I can count:
“Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”
Notice what God promises. Not that you’ll suddenly feel brave. Not that starting over will stop being hard. But that He will be your strength.
Bravery comes and goes. God remains faithful.
What I Didn’t Know Then
I originally wrote about this moment years ago, not long after it happened. Updating this story now—fifteen years later—feels a little emotional because I can finally see more clearly what God was building in a season that once felt so overwhelming.
What I didn’t know that day was that God was doing far more than easing a hard moment.
He was beginning a story.
I couldn’t have known, sitting on that bench with my arms crossed and my courage at zero, that God was beginning one of the great friendships of my life. I just knew I was tired. He knew everything else.
Fifteen years later, what started with that simple introduction has grown into one of my closest friendships — a prayer partner and faithful companion through every season.
We’ve walked through raising teenagers together. Kids’ weddings and new beginnings. Seasons of loss and grief. And now the joy of grandparenting.
All from a moment when I didn’t even have the courage to say hello.

God Is Doing More Than You Can See Right Now
When you’re in the middle of a hard transition, you can’t see what God is building. You only feel what’s uncomfortable, awkward, or exhausting. You wonder if it’s worth trying again. You wonder if connection is even possible from where you’re standing.
But God sees the whole story.
I look back now and see His kindness woven through that morning in ways I couldn’t recognize at the time. He didn’t force me to be brave. He provided for me right where I was — feeling alone, arms crossed, barely praying.
Friend, He’s not waiting for you to get it together first. He met me on a cafeteria bench with my prayers barely formed. That’s where He shows up — right in the middle of the mess, right in the middle of the move, right in the middle of the new place that doesn’t feel like home yet.
Habit of Hope
This week, release the pressure to make something happen.
If starting over feels hard right now — if you’re feeling alone in a new place and you don’t have the strength to try again — let this be your prayer:
“Lord, would you bring the right people into my path?”
And then simply pay attention.
Notice who shows up. Notice the small beginnings. Notice the moment someone says your name across a crowded room.
Because sometimes hope doesn’t begin with our effort. It begins with receiving what God is already bringing to us.
You may not feel ready. You may not feel brave. You may be tired of starting over.
But you are not alone in that place. And the God who sees you in your weakness? He’s already at work.
FAQ: Starting Over, Feeling Alone, and Where God Meets You
Why is starting over so emotionally exhausting — even when it’s not your first time? Because every transition involves real loss — of community, of stability, of knowing where you belong. That cumulative weight is real. After twenty-two years of military moves, I can tell you: it doesn’t automatically get easier just because you’ve done it before. But those tender, worn-out places are often exactly where God meets us most personally.
What do you do when you’re feeling alone in a new place and don’t have the energy to try again? Be honest with God about exactly where you are. Not polished, not composed — honest. The prayer I prayed that day was almost an admission of defeat more than a faith-filled request: Lord, I can’t do this. You’re going to have to bring someone to me. He answered it in ten minutes. You don’t need courage first. You just need willingness to let Him work.
Does God really meet you where you are — even when you’re too tired to reach out? Yes. That’s the heart of this story. He meets you where you are — not after you’ve found your footing, not after you’ve settled in, not after you feel brave enough. Sometimes He strengthens us to reach out. And sometimes, like He did for me that morning, He brings the hello to us.
How do you trust God with the loneliness of a hard transition? One small prayer at a time. I’m not sure I trusted God fully that morning — I was just too tired to do anything else. But He was faithful anyway. He often works through ordinary moments — a familiar face, a timely introduction, a simple smile — that carry something much deeper underneath. What looks like a small kindness can be the beginning of one of the great gifts of your life.
What if connection just doesn’t seem to be happening, no matter how hard I try? Friend, sometimes the most faithful thing you can do is stop trying so hard and start paying attention. Notice who God is already placing in your path. The friendships that have meant the most to me didn’t begin with my best effort — they began with small, unexpected moments I almost missed.

A Personal Note
If you’ve ever struggled with anxiety, overwhelm, or the emotional exhaustion of major life transitions, I share more about where this struggle began for me in the first chapter of Holy in the Moment. It’s a deeply personal part of my story—and one of the places where God began meeting me in a deeper way. You can read the chapter free here.

From the Archives: Life, Moving, and Starting Over
One of the gifts of having a blog that has been around for more than 15 years is that it holds pieces of so many different seasons of my life. Long before podcasts and books, I was writing my way through military moves, culture shock, parenting transitions, and the emotional challenge of starting over again.
Looking back now, I can see God’s faithfulness woven through those earlier stories in ways I couldn’t fully see at the time. Here are a few posts from the archives if you’d like to step back into some of those seasons with me:
- The Ornery Moving Hormone
- If I Had Not Moved to Okinawa, I Would Have Never…
- Last Days of Our Adventure in Okinawa, Japan
- Why Moving is More Than Unpacking










