A Guest post from Jaimi Erickson:

when i feel alone vertical title (1)

I have not always been the most patient person.

Some who know me as a mom of 4 (including twins), illness who see how patient I can be (operative words CAN BE) juggling my children, may think I am lying, but I am not naturally a patient person. At the age of 8, while doing homework one night, I asked my mom for help on a math problem. At the end of her helping me through a stressful lesson, I said, “I think I will have to learn patience in my life.” At eight I knew patience was my weakness.

God had plans for me.

I make a career of waiting. I am a military wife–hurry up and wait is part of my life.

I am alone a lot.

I often wait for my husband to get home after 3 weeks away at a field operation or return from a 6 month deployment.

I wait a lot.

Add in being a mom–you know how that goes–and I pretty much have to wait for everyone. Patience does not come easily.

I wait alone.

Every evening during a deployment it is just me after the kids go to sleep. Hopefully they stay asleep because I have had quite the exercise in sleep deprivation over the last few years. I basically am alone as the only adult running the show. Om In the antrums,  the spilled cheerios, and the toy mess that rivals the aftermath of a tornado–I am alone.

I find myself full of envy over friends who have close girlfriends . The kind of friends that help them in every  tough situation. They got through the hard things together-not alone.

I get impatient when I cannot find that type of support when I want it. It is nice to be part of a group, to have close friends and a support system.

During deployment I often go a few days without talking to another adult. I am a stay-at-home mom, so that is not totally odd given my daily situation. I am surrounded by little people who really are great fun most moments of the day. Since having twins, I have not been able to reach out and start playgroups or host playdates as often as in the past. This is hard because I feel a need to meet other moms and be social, to not feel so alone.

It is frustrating trying to develop new friendships when they seem to take forever to grow.

Hitting a point in my season of motherhood-when I went from two children to four with the twins’ birth-where I could not even manage to find the time to host a playdate, I really became isolated. It was depressing. But my focus was not in the right place. I was being impatient.

I wanted to cling to mom friends who could be there when I needed them. Instead, I had to dig deep and cling to God.

God had me right where he needed me. I was forced to rely on the strength He provided. His words of encouragement and prayer became my internal voice. They helped me get through the tough days of single parenting.

[tweetthis]When I embrace being alone to truly feel the presence of God in my life, that’s grace.[/tweetthis]

I don’t always like that I learn to trust and cling to God more when I am alone.  God knows how I learn, He knows what I need to fully commit to Him. He knows that I need to learn to wait for His guidance.

three crosses Bible verse when i feel alone (1)

The reality is, I am never alone. There are 4 little ones who eagerly want me with them much of the day. They remind me that I have my place, and it is firmly planted on the path that God wants me traveling.

I know I am not alone.

I walk with God so I work to maintain patience while following His lead.

What do you do when you feel alone?

 

Jaimi EricksonJaimi Erickson is a Christian stay-at-home mom to 4 (2+twins), a military wife, and former teacher. She shares faith-based motivation for moms, frugal homeschool activities for infants, toddlers, preschool and school-age kids, and homemaking tips on her blog The Stay-at-Home Mom Survival Guide. Grab a cup of coffee and connect with her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

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